I laughed. I cried. And, frankly, I quaked in fear. Yep. Four years ago I was convinced - CONVINCED - that there was no way in hell Americans would re-elect the world's dumbest national leader. Wait, make that history's dumbest national leader. I was wrong. And now? Everywhere I look, people are making excuses for (when they're not actually praising!) McBush's choice of a gun-totin', oil-suckin', god-fearin' bimbo from a state with a population of - what? 12? - as his running mate. A woman who was stupid enough to purposely sentence an unborn fetus to a lifetime of misery, to praise her obviously brain-damaged daughter for keeping her baby even though said daughter is only 17 years old (has she even actually graduated from high school?), was a member of a political party that wanted Alaska to secede from the Union...! A woman who thinks that "running" a town with a population smaller than that of the student population at the community college where I teach qualifies her for the Vice Presidency! And poor old Levi! There'd better be a big payoff waiting for that poor sucker. "Oh, fer sure - I'm gonna marry her. Fer sure!" At 18?!? Kiss your life good-bye, pal.

Look, I'm a cynic. I think I was probably born this way. But, please, even cynics can only take so much. Please, for the love of the god in whom I do not believe, please, please, please do not elect this Dimwitted Duo! I'm begging you! Please!